mix posted on facebook:
august: ^^ GLAMOUR ERA ^^
there is found a perfect name for the past years in Berlin^^ the
glamour era which I photographed and paint now in oil on canvas.
glamour in Berlin will go finally with the resignation of the
mayor Klaus Wowereit and the glamour of the underground party
scene is definatly gone with the passing of Brian. in those past
years everything was glamour GLAMour GLAMOUR
glamour era of Berlin is gone and we will aaaaaaalways remember
it <3 :*
august: I am still very happy that I found a name for the serie
of paintings I am working on :)
Berlin newspaper named the years of mayor Klaus Wowereit "the
word "GLAM" and "glamour" was one of the most
favorites words of Brian too ^^ he lived it ^^ we lived it ^^
have no more big plans for my future. I just want to paint as
much as possible photographies which I took in past GLAM years
... and I took a looooot ... about 120 000
september: Patrick´s monologs: I don´t know who that
was never interessted that people take pictures of me ... I avoided
it ... almost all my life. there exist only few pictures of my
body & face. and in the past years while wearing my mask,
only a handfull of pictures got realized.
a brand new feeling, that I accept my body & face and I am
willing to learn about it and myself. ... I am 40 years now.
am stearing at those pictures and selfies of me ... and I am confused,
because I´ve never really seen that guy ... then I say to
myself "I don´t know who that guy is." ... almost
all my life I was more interessted what is going on inside of
my body, soul, heart and brain. watching & talking about my
body & face annoyed me and even made me aggressive. ... those
years are over now ... somehow it feels new ... new born
september: Patrick´s dream became true*
painting in oil on canvas with that enormous size of 1,50 x 1,80
meters ... now in front of me hanging on a wall ... and I created
it ... having my own style ... the painting is phascinating alive
... it shows a party scene at PORKparty with Brian and friends
moment which one I may have ... right now ... is one of my dreams
became true and I would nothing wish more than to share that moment
feels sureal to see Brian on that painting ... which got created
shortly after his death ... feeling the drama and the pain and
at the same knowing that one of my biggest dreams became true
... not just being in a museum and watching big paintings created
by others ... this time I created that painting .... .... many
years I thought, that I would never be able to do that, and after
a looooong way ... now I did it
am sure: Brian would be proud of me
september: today I had an almost "couldn´t stop to
paint" day ... I worked a lot on backgrounds for new paintings
created after photographies showing Wowereit, Tilda Swinton, Mona
Lisa, David Garrett and maaaany more ... actually I paint simultaneous
on about 25 paintings ... I love it to work that way*
september: Brian is here.
am sitting and laying on his designed couch every day.
I have his REVOLUTION denim jacket here.
I listen to his music ... every day.
One of his last artworks ... a print ... lays on the table.
Everywhere in the flat & studio are marks left ... created
And now: Brian is watching me from an almost lifesize painting
... in the center of the living room.
am fine with that*
Dali had Gala as his motor ...
and I have Brian´s soul as my motor ...
september: Patrick´s opinion about signing of paintings:
most important thing is: that the "glamorous era" of
the past years in Berlin will be saved for future generations.
it doesn´t matter WHO does it. ... I do it because I was
part of it, but ... believe it or not ... I don´t see myself
that much important, that my name has any relevance. the only
thing what counts: is: THE PAINTING
times I forget to sign artworks ... and I know that in future
it is perhaps interessting, when artworks are found somewhere,
to know who created them <= this is the number one reason why
artworks should be signed
I sign my created artworks ... as part of the working process
... but just on the backside
see my job more related to an historiographer ... and I like that*
... those colorful times of Berlin should always be remembered
september: I have a dream too
love those people in Afghanistan, Irak, Iran, Syria, Yemen, Jordan,
are AMAZING beautiful ...
very intelligent (they had a loooooot of universities, clinics,...)
PHANTASTIC colorful cloths (created of highest quality such as
a breathtaking thousands of years old culture with STUNNING treasures
people are ENORMOUS gentle, funny and loveable <3
HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT ALL THAT HAS BEEN FORGOTTEN !?
I ever see laughing and loving people in those areas again !?
have a dream too
september: Patrick loves <3 Amanda <3 (Seyfried) oooooh
it was a magic moment when Brian & I have been at the door
and Amanda entered PORKparty °° Brian jumped over the
table and asked her "are you ...?" ... Amanda answered
just "no" ... I had no idea who she is and was just
phascinated by her beauty. ... and obviously she liked the party
:* .... .... .... "OOOOH Brian, thaaaaat maaaaaany stories
remind me about you :* "
september: I always feeeeeeel it .... and I am happy when those
crazy supermoons will be over *hhmmmppppfffff* tooooo much action
... everywhere around *hhhmmmpppffff*
september: what a wonderful learning by doing afternoon
when I started to paint with oil on canvas, then some people said
to me "don´t do it! it´s poison! it´s dangerous!
IT´S GONNA DESTROY YOU!"
the past months I just thought "fine ... if this is the price
... then I will pay it"
I checked out all that "dangerous" stuff in the internet
... I learned a lot about materials such as terpentin ... even
terpentin is a nature product which is gained from trees *WOW*
I realized that I can relax now ... it´s not gonna destroy
and even Tizian reached the age of 91 years ^^
september: " I am 80 years old and I am from Israel. it´s
my last journey ... "
I have a regular job ... some nights of the months I am working
in a hotel. I like that job ... it keeps me in contact with people
from all classes from all around the world ... and some conversations
I will remember and yes, they have an influence to my art ...
was touching when tonite and old man came here and started his
conversation with " I am 80 years old and I am from Israel.
it´s my last journey ... "
september: Sean Lennon at PORKparty°°
almost never recognized a celebrity and I needed people to tell
me who is who ...
Sean Lennon did party with us for some hours. he came there after
the 80-years-birthday party of his mom, who celebrated in a theatre
he left PORKparty someone told me, that Sean Lennon was here.
I asked Brian about it and when he said yes, then I asked him
"why you didn´t tell me, that Sean was here?"
and Brian´s answered "you would have freaked out"
I woulD HAVE NEEEEEVEEER FrreEEaaaaAKkKKED O UT kNOWING SsSSSEEEEEEAAAAAAAANNNNN
LEEEeeeNNNNOOOONNN IS On THE SaME PARTy AS I AM XoPPPP
september: being strong
in life the only choice you have is being strong. and right now:
this is my choice too
course nothing what I do is perfect ... I do a lot of mistakes
... while being strong. this causes a lot of different reactions
of people around me: some are laughing about it, because it seems
to be as a parody what I am doing right now. some are jealous,
because they are not able to realize what it needs to be to become
strong. some are ignorant, because they got frightened by strong
people. some insult me, because they would prefer to see me fail.
and last but not least: of course those people who support me
while being strong.
one year ago there didn´t exist a thaaat much big reason
to me to be strong. I knew that my 30 years older mentor Gunther
in Vienna has always an answer to me when I call him ... Gunther
died in november 2013. I could handle it, because I had Brian
here in Berlin and I knew that he has always a fitting wise answer
for me too. Brian died on 5th june 2014. No one knew me that much
good as Gunther and Brian did it ... they kept me strong ... for
about 20 years.
I am kind of alone and I decided not to give up ... I choose the
way of learning how to be strong ... just by myself ... it´s
a new feeling ... and an every day´s fight
yes, there is one close person left on that planet: I love her:
<3 my mom <3
september: when I asked Brian "where do you have been at
11th september?" then he answered "in New York"
... he never talked a lot about that day, but I will always remember
his expression in his face ... a mix of endless shock and endless
sadness ... even years later
september: +++ VERALTET & VERSTAUBT +++ Das Schwule Museum
erwartet man das ja auch von einem "Museum" ... ich
war noch nicht ein mal in den Neuen Räumlichkeiten des Schwulen
Museums ... warum auch? was soll ich dort? mich langweilen? ...
da verbringe ich meine Zeit lieber bei einem Spaziergang auf dem
Es gab bisher nicht einen Moment, ein Argument welches in mir
einen "WOW-Effect" "DA MUSS ICH HIN!" auslöste.
In den alten Räumlichkeiten war es übrigens nicht besser.
leben nicht mehr in den 60er Jahren ... das Schwule Museum ist
NIE im 21.Jhdt angekommen.
... und weiters: z. B. man kann nicht einfach eine Pasolini Ausstellung
machen OHNE Pasolini VORHER den Menschen welche UNTER 60 Jahre
alt sind näher zu bringen.
übrigens geschätzte 95 % !!! !!! !!! meiner internationalen
Künstlerfreunde zwischen 18 und 45 Jahren, waren auch noch
nie im Neuen Schwulen Museum! ... das hat seine Gründe.
SCHADE SCHADE SCHADE ums Schwule Museum ... aber OHNE Kompletterneuerung
sämtlicher Strukturen wird das wohl nix mehr
und ja: dies alles predige ich bereits seit vielen vielen Jahren
... und leider: es ändert sich einfach nichts
september: manchmal müssen´s einfach FISCHSTÄBCHEN
zum Mittagessen sein *mmmjammmyyy* 10 waren´s heute =P
september: that awkward moment, when I decided not the leave the
underground and stay in there for some moooooore stations, because
the guy sitting opposite of me was thaaaaat muuuuuch H O T =P
DAMN what an athletic L.A. surfer beach guy that was =P ... he
didn´t realize me at all ... he was busy playing with his
september: nervous !? of course I am nervous: in some minutes
I will enter an art university ... for the first time in my life
... when someone will ask me there "who are you?" ...
then I will answer "äähhhmm ... nothing ... just
nobody" ... what else should I answer!? ... whatever ...
today is the opening of the Berlin Art Week and I am excited to
go to the Opening at the Academy of Arts =D see you there :*
september: ^^ Patrick Bartsch ENEMY nr. 1 ^^ at the opening of
Berlin Art Week at Academy of Arts:
the opening speech they talked about the new plans about the free
trade agreement between the European Union and the United States.
they said, that people from the art scene should fear it and it´s
gonna change the situation of artists in every way.
WHAT THEY MEAN IS, that: right now artists at universities get
supported in every way, get supported with money and everything
by Germany. In the United States artists depend on PRIVATE sponsors.
<= INDEED that is something complete different !!!
they invited me to discuss, then I said: I have never been to
an art university (because I could never afford it) and I am working
exactly THAT AMERICAN WAY: I depend on private sponsors and got
N E V E R any support from Germany as artist. and YES! I support
the American Way! ... after I said that, they stopped the conversation
with me ... I guess that wasn´t the thing they wanted to
exhibition itself was: let me tell it in a short conversation
with a woman (age around 58 years and seemed to be part of the
Patrick: "if the people have to wait thaaaaaat much long
to enter the exhibition, then at least they should get awared
with great art!"
Woman: "there are many exhibitions which are much more bad
than this one!"
Patrick: "that exhibition belongs to one of the worst, which
I have ever seen."
very quick I got the feeling, that they don´t want me there
... and I left ... into the darkness of Berlin ... keeping my
minds there where I want them to have ... and not them want me
september: okokok some of the latest paintings are not thaaaat
much good ... okokok they are bad.
since some months I feel more weird than relaxed
+ I see myself still as beginner as a painter ... I do it now
in an intense way since 1 year and 9 months
+ okokok no more excuses ... I have to become better ^^
september: * I sell my art *
10 years I live in Berlin and since 10 years NO GALLERY wanted
to represent me ...
and now it´s me who doesn´t want a gallery anymore
I offer art directly from the artist ... it has a loooot of advantages
and not only that the price is muuuuuuch cheaper
some days ago I had a talk with a gallerist who showed his interest
in my work. he said "where do you show your art?"
... and then I just had to say it that way (after 10 years treated
bad from many galleries) " I don´t show my art in exhibitions,
because I sell it that much fast, that many paintings are still
wet, when they got already ordered. I am not interessted in showing
my art in galleries. "
know I know I know it was kind of arrogant to talk that way ...
but I needed it to do that way ... just ONE TIME :*
september: <3 Brian <3 the best what happened to me in Berlin*
september: Brian called me "can you come here?"
Brian on the phone "because it is important!"
took some presents for Brian, and took a taxi to his flat
spent the whole evening together ... till late at night ... when
he felt asleep ... I left the flat
has been wonderful hours and the last time I met Brian