<3 Brian <3 7th june 2014

Brian-Tennessee Claflin
Dec. 2, 1980 - June 5, 2014


Brian my love
Brian my muse
Brian my friend
Brian my brother

Brian my everything


last dance
last song
last hug
last smile

in my heart forever


on friday evening I had a frightened feeling about Brian. ... somehow I missed him visiting me, his presence on fb since some days,... for that reason I decided to start a group chat with some of his closest friends, starting with the words "WHERE IS BRIAN?" nobody knew anything and the whole evening we tried to find him. I went to bed at around 11 p.m. friday evening. when I woke up on saturday morning at around 8 a.m. and started fb, then I could see already the first postings about Brian´s death. I lost the love of my life. I started crying and my tears didn´t stop run out of my eyes for the next 7 days

pls find some of my emotional feelings from those days when Brian left this world, below in the postings of fb


some postings which I created on facebook 13th april 2014 - 17th june 2014
filed under mix

stories mix posted on facebook:

13th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ *knows what it means "GETTING BULLIED AT SCHOOL" ... I know what it means getting beaten for years by a group of older children ... I know how it feels when in the age of 13 my head crashed on a stone floor ... at that time I wasn´t able to talk with no one about that and needed to find fake reason, that I was able to change the school ... and did hide my queer personality all my life at school ... because of fear. ... and guess what: here on fb I am connected with the worst leading bully which did all that when I was 12 to 14 years young ... I think he forgot what he did ... but I didn´t! ... and one day when the time is right I will talk to him in my very own special way ... however this will look like. ... aaaaaand now pls watch that STUNNING performance of those kids about "BULLING AT SCHOOL" *APPLAUSE* * APPLAUSE* *APPLAUSE*

13th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ *I am not afraid to be honest* if I should loose everyone because of that, then I still have friends: <3 stones <3

13th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ dear James Franco, pls do your movies* you are an AMAZING actor and let do your brother ART ^^ YES, Tom´s art is stunning and I love it <3 James, there is almost no soul in your art - even when you try it, it isn´t there

13th may: is against capitalism because: I LOVE THIS WORLD and I LOVE THOSE PEOPLE LIVING ON THAT PLANET ... yes <3 each one <3

14th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ question "what do have Conchita Wurst, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Fantasy48 in common?" answer "we spent our teenage years in Styria / Austria" =D I wonder which place I would have made with my song at the ESC *LOL* *good night everyone :*

16th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ just started an experiment with myself: I am wondering what is happening having a painting like this one (the sun) in the living room ^^ my first round painting represent the sun of course* 3 colors used: yellow, white and gold

16th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ OMG I am just realizing how muuuuuuch I missed Tchaikovsky in the past months ^^ THIS MUSIC A BLAAAAAAST =D

16th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ working on new paintings ^^ I think this one is finished* my goal is to paint about 10 paintings each months - this year I finished about 57 ... means I am good on the run :) wish you a wonderful day <3 :*

16th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ *sitting on my balcony and watching my neighbours: streethustlers, female prositutes, dr*g addicts, out of control party people, art freaks,... just wish CARAVAGGIO would join the balcony with me* I am sure he would loooove that crowd ^^

17th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ a good facebook start at 6 a.m. in the morning in Berlin (*ääähmmm* what the f*ck I am doing here at 6 a.m.!? =oP) starts with a GREAT picture of River Viiperi and his HOT underwear design :* *Happy Weekend to Everyone*

17th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ it was a GREAT enough-is-enough demonstration on the International Day against Homo- and Transphobia ^^ ... aaaand I met *WOOOAAAAUUUUUHHH* LEGENDAAAARY Dr. MOTTE <3... and YES, I will paint this photography in oil on canvas* ... and now I need to prepare my flat for the Open Studio - starting in 1 hour*

18th may: + NEVER AGAIN + today I continued working on 2 portraits photographed in front of the memorial for queer people have been killed in WW2 + it brought tears in my eyes while writing letter by letter " BEATEN TO DEATH - KEPT DEAD QUIET - FOR THE GAY VICTIMS OF THE NATIONAL SOCIALISM " and realizing WHAT I writing + NEVER AGAIN +

20th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ since more than 5 years I haven´t met someone new on GR - I got bored by those "hi" and "want to have s*x now" messages ... and the letters "XXL" in my profile is the only information they are really interested in. BUT now it looks like as if the spell got broke. a very good looking 27 yo Italian guy with a stunning natural athletic body (1,90 meters) and an stunning charismatic face got in contact with me - aaaaand he knows how to use words ... his first message sounds like poem and he offered himself as muse to me^^ T H A T guy knows how to reach an artist´s heart <3 ... I invited him to one of my next Open Studios ... I hope this story will be continued :*

21st may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ Versace looks as much worst as Donatella looks like *ggrrmmmpffff* HEY GIANNI, THEY TRY TO COPY YOU, BUT THEY FORGET THAT THEY DON´T HAVE YOUR SOUL <3 Gianni 4ever <3

21st may: Fantasy48 loves Berlin <3

22nd may: gut gesagt ... uuuuund ich kann dazu nur sagen "in erster Linie stehe ich auf intelligente Männer und das schließt schon mal jeden Homophoben aus."

22nd may: my dear loved friend Gene in Bangkok wrote those heartbreaking words "Whatever happens. I'm just gonna keep on dancing." ... our thoughts are with you!

23rd may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ today someone complained about the posting "Lucian Freud painting a naked woman" ... is Lucian Freud - one of the greatest painters of the past century - wrong!? NO he can´t be wrong! ... is a NAKED WOMAN - I love each one - wrong!? NO a naked woman never can be wrong! ... I am wondering what Lucian Freud´s grandfather Sigmund Freud would say about that society we are living in today ...

23rd may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ *word world* don´t buy your art at IKEA & Co - buy your art from artists/galleries and save their lives too <3

23rd may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ ... you know you are a SUPERSTAR, when: your plane inside looks like THAT =D YOSHIKI IS ON HIS WAY TO BEEEEERLIN =D ... and I have no ticket, because I am a too much poor artist *hmmmmpfffff* <3 I LOVE YOSHIKI - my modern Mozart <3

25th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ ja, da treffen wohl alle 18 Punkte (18 Dinge die kreative Menschen anders machen) voll auch auf mich zu *hmmm* ... und JA, es ist nicht immer einfach so zu leben ... aber es ist nun mal wie es ist ... und ich habe gelernt mein Leben so wie es ist dankbar anzunehmen. ... der schwierigste Punkt für mich ist dieser über die Einsamkeit ... wünsche mir und arbeite seit ewigen Zeiten stark daran dies zu ändern, aber ich fühle mich leider in einer gewissen Einsamkeit (welche ich auch unter meiner Maske lebe) am wohlsten und ja, in dieser Einsamkeit bin ich äußerst kreativ und produktiv. Es ist wohl die stark ausgeprägte Empathie welche der Auslöser dazu ist - selbst in großen Menschenansammlungen empfinde ich jegliches Glücksgefühl bis hin zu stärkstem Leid welches Menschen ausstrahlen, in starker Form. Für jeden einzelnen habe/hätte ich wohlwollende Worte - da es jedoch unmöglich ist mit jedem/jeder Einzelnem der über 6 Mrd Menschen persönlich in Gesprächen in Kontakt zu treten, habe ich mich für die Kunst entschieden - um so die Menschen/Menschheit auf eine positive Art und Weise zu erreichen

25th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ VIOLENCE AS SPORT in Berlin: and again and again and again VIOLENCE against queer people, police men, ... IT BECAME a kind of SPORT in Berlin to attack certain groups of people. those young people who attack have NOTHING to fear: when they beat up people such as gays, police men,... they got traded and honored as heroes from their friends, their society and even their own family! Many mothers and fathers say that when their kids have to go to prison, then it is a good education for them ... means they even don´t fear prison and their own parents -------- after thinking a loooooot about that situation in Berlin, I found just one solution: leading persons/people of those groups have to talk against that violence and hate ... and I am talking about EVERY GROUP: the turkish people, the russian people and of course the german people too! BUT how should we expect good words from other groups, when even the leaders of the Germans are NOT ABLE to accept queer people as full members of the society .... !? --------- THE HUNT against Queers, Police, ... is already in full run in Berlin! PLS TAKE CARE ABOUT YOURSELF! ... some years ago I did Wing Chun/Kung Fu training for self defense ... things like that I can suggest to you too. .... but the best thing when troubles are around you: pls go away and if neccessary: RUN! <= this is what my Kung Fu Master (one of the best in Germany - who came from a direct line of Ip Man) teached us on the first day ...

26th may: Mr. President Obama photographed by ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ and soon painted in oil on canvas^^

26th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ sometimes it just has to be Carl Orff´s O FORTUNA *lalalalalaaaa*

30th may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ means *and It matters ^^ today at different places in Berlin: rising up the rainbow flag <3 BIG THX to eeeeveryone and Jörg Steinert and Jurassica Parka and Stark Patent and and and :*

30th may: today´s ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^´s university of art has very special and eeeexciting lessons ^^ tutorials about drawing a male and female body and "How to Draw Breasts" .... I Love It <3

31st may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^´s weekend RANT: there are a looooot of people which are non-stop screaming for TOLERANCE, but THeIR tolerance ends immediatly when it´s about CONCHITA WURST: everyone who isn´t such a BIG fan as they are, is immediatly on a BLACK LIST and AN EEEENEMY! you know what: that bores me. --- pls may people have another opinion too!? from my view: Conchita is GREAT as person, BUT isn´t she good enough for a winning voice and winning song of a contest of more than 500 mio people living in Europe!? I am sure there exist a looooooot more BETTER voices in europe ... OOOH what did I write again!? feeding those "tolerant" people with an opinion which they don´t tolerate at all *hhhmmmmpppffff* ... btw: YES! I am a fan of Anna Netrebko too, even she performed at the Olympic Games in Sochi ... and guess what: even then people deleted me from their friendslist because of being a fan of Anna; that I like a woman, her performance and voice! --- "PEOPLE OF TOLERANCE: GROW-UP! and start with the first tolerance lesson: tolerate others opinions!"

31st may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ just watching LIFEBALL Livestream ... and realizing how dark it is already in Vienna and in Berlin it is still very bright outside* ... I remember when I was the first time at Lifeball ... it has been the second and I went to the third and fourth ... at that time it has been much smaller - only inside Vienna´s Cityhall ... there didn´t exist an VIP area at that time ... it was being with a family together ... some years later I went there 4 times more ... and this year it is the first time, that I watch it very relaxed from my couch ... and I enjoy it :) LIFEBALL is a GREAT thing and deserves every support possible^^ I <3 LIVEBALL

31st may: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ ... and Bela Fischer, the guy who composed the LIFEBALL song, composed a song for an art event I created about 18 years ago in Vienna: it was named "Burning Culture Night" and about 40 different artists from Opera, Painters, Rocksingers, Sculpture artists, Muscial artists,... have been part of that event ... even the minister for inner affairs joined that event which I created in the age of 22. it was a GREAT PHANTASTIC night and about 500 people joined that event, BUT I planed 1000 thousand people as guests ... means that night did cost about 10 000 euro to me ... and guess what: I NEEEEEVER created an event again ... meanwhile I am able to smile about it :) ... I needed 3 years to pay the money back ... for ONE night FULL of art ... and it was worth it!

1st june: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ yesterday my <3 Professor of Art <3 (Pascual) was here for some minutes - yes, the guy who teaches me everything about oil on canvas and he made it possible too, that I started to paint. I meet him very rare, but he explains me everything with few words and I understand it. yesterday I told him how many paintings I did (about 100 in 2013 and about 60 this year). He said: "that is that much, that you really mean it serious" ...and YES, I DO! ...I showed him 3 of my favorite paintings and his reaction was, looking at the first "I don´t like it." looking at the second "I don´t like it." and looking at the third and saying nothing ... means he likes it on a way ... And he said I need to learn now more about proportions ... ........ and this is what I do right now ... it feels terrible ... as being at school *uuurgggssss* ... yes, and this painting is the first result after painting it while watching videos about proportions ... *hhhmmmmm* I think it looks as I feel .... *hmmmpppffff*

3rd june: +++ PLS NEED CORN +++ in 10 days there will be the lesbian gay streetparty (with about 600 000 people for 2 days&nights in Schöneberg and my studio is located next to the main stage) and I would looooove to prepare some *mmjuummmyyyy* FRESH POPCORN :* Brian-Tennessee brought that wonderful machine here some months ago, but I am not able to get some corn (there are no Asia shops around here and the other shops don´t have it :( ) pls when you know where to get some 99 cent corn, pls buy it and bring it here :* ... and YES, Brian will show some of his artwork here on that weekend* Marianne Lapin & Marc Raps are you going to show some of your fab art too?

4th june: this looks very similar they way I grew up ... and today I got shocked day by day more and more, that this is not the reality for everyone on that planet ... I think it is one of the reasons that I am here on that planet: to fight for it, that this peaceful life with nature is possible to everyone <3 ... and it is!

4th june: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ meint: 3 CSD-Paraden in Berlin: finde ich GROSSARTIG ^^ jeder dieser CSD´s hat seine Stärken und seine absolute Existenzberechtigung ^^ Berlin ist mit CSD´s ziemlich abgedeckt und GENAU DAS ist zur Zeit BITTER NOTWENDIG in einem immer gewaltvolleren Berlin ... mein übergeordnetes Motto aller 3 CSD´s lautet somit "GEMEINSAM SIND WIR STARK! LET´S GO!"

5th june: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ what a weeeirrred but goooood dream Cody Simpson was veeeery mean to me at the beginning, because he thought, that I don´t know who he his. later in the dream we became best friends. Patrick Schwarzenegger was the star all over the dream =D and last but not least I got my selfie pic with his dad Arnold * ... reality or dream ... I don´t care ... it just happened :)

5th june: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ okokok FAB Francis IS one of my BIG inspirations for my paintings ^^ ... and I love it <3 ... and him :*

5th june: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ Baptiste ^^ one of the most stunning models on his way to be one of the most stunning french musicians ^^

6th june: next thursday: ^^ 7 years Werkstattgalerie Berlin ^^ *applause* *applause* *applause* to Pascual Jordan & Mirko Freiwald *applause* with a loooot of shows such as with Erdem Gündüz *The standing man from the Taksim Place*, Madame Paris and maaaaany more :*

6th june: ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ says ^^ WELCOME TO BERLIN Mustang Wanted ^^ hope you have a GREAT time =D looks like at Teufelsberg* for you of course the highest point of Berlin =D

7th june: <3 Brian my love <3

7th june: R.I.P. <3 Brian-Tennessee Claflin <3

7th june: once at PORKparty when Brian was sitting next to me, I told him " look Brian, they are all here because of you. they love you." Brian answered " I love them too <3 each one <3 "

7th june: todays open studio is for everyone who needs/wants to mourn about <3 Brian-Tennessee Claflin <3 we will sit on his created art couch, eat popcorn made with his popcorn machine, listen to his music, ...

8th june: I could have never imagined, that once I will sit at the door of PORKparty and ask for entrance fee to save money to return Brian´s dead body to America. it breaks my heart. can´t stop crying

8th june: some years ago I was sitting at the barstool at the door of PORKparty. it was hot, I drunk some beers, and with the mask ... I collapsed and woke up some minutes later laying on the couch. I asked why my body doesn´t hurt when I was falling from the barstool. and Brian answered "I catched you up! I would never let fall you down." ... and who should catch me tonite? ... Brian-Tennessee Claflin I miss you already thaaaaat much :(

9th june: it has been always like that: when Brian-Tennessee Claflin wasn´t able to come to PORKparty, then he expected my report immediatly when I returned home. so I wanna give a report about tonite´s PORKparty: at around 4 a.m. the wonderful DJ Jason played Whitney´s "my love is your love". while listening to the first words I started crying immediatly and went to a table in the back. when I listened to the lyrics "through each other's eyes" I felt it warm and enjoyable deep inside of my soul and thought "ok Brian, when you are here now and you want to see what is happening *through my eyes* then let´s do it." I felt him while the next two more songs and this is what he saw: candles at the entrance of the club, a wonderful big picture of himself and a fresh flower on the side, on every about 10 small and big televisions there have been videos, interviews and pictures of Brian shown, the great DJ´s such as Paul, Jason, ... played his favorite music, at the door wonderful Toby and more collected money for Brian´s family (thank you Toby that you did the door, it would have been very hard for me to do it tonite, so I was glad that you did it). almost everyone of Brian´s friends joined the PORKnight (about 300 people came) - they looked like: one girl with big black tears painted in her face, others used glitter as tears under their eyes and maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaany had real tears, almost everytime it was possible to see friends crying on a despairing way, people huged and consoled eachother, people told eachother never ending wonderful, heartful stories about Brian. and people realized again that Brian brought them all together and gave them a part of his life, soul & heart which they will never forget ...

<3 I had the feeling that Brian would have loved that party <3

and I would like to thank Frank (the bar owner) and the Ficken3000 crew for decorating the club in Brian´s memory, the barkeepers, Frank & Pietro for creating beautiful video mixes for the televisions, the DJ´s & doormen (which names I mentioned above) and of course aaaaaallllll guests.
and a special THANK YOU to all those loved friends which huged me and gave me their shoulders when tears flew out of my eyes

11th june: today is the first day that I haven´t cried about Brian´s loss. the past days I cried almost non-stop. I had no idea how BIG tears can be. I got almost used to my tears running out of my eyes. I knew already their ways over my face till ending up at my belly and building a little lake in my bellybutton.

it was the second time in my life that I have been that much close to someone as it happened with Brian. my first love happened about 19 years ago and will always be my first love. but Brian was my BIGGEST love of my life. it wasn´t planed that way. it grew and grew and grew ... there haven´t been left any secrets between us ... and we did trust eachother with closed eyes.

about 7 years ago I met him on my balcony and he climed over the balcony into my flat and life ... in exactly a way of Romeo and Juliet. and we lived it that way with all ups and downs and good and bad times. but whatever happened: our love to eachother always continued and grew more and more.

and now I am crying again

13th june: tomorrow the lesbian gay streetparty with about 600 000 people will happen and it was planed to show 4 artists at the Open Studio ^^ Marianne Lapin Marc Raps Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art and Brian-Tennessee Claflin ^^

the HIGHLIGHT of the groupshow will be a denim jacket created by <3 Brian <3

... once he was standing behind me while I was wearing my denim jacket. Brian had a BIG black edding in his hand and asked "may I write something on your jacket!?" I answered "Yes, sure!" he asked "what should I write!?" I said "how to change America." ... and what he wrote on the back of my jacket you will see at our group-show ^^ ... and YES! Brian´s spirit will be part of it

13th june: no poem and no song is able to describe the emotions which I am going through those days

but I realized one thing for sure: it is YOU ... people around me ... your love ... which are helping me to continue breathing and continue to let my heart beat

and for this I wanna THANK YOU from the deepest bottom of my heart

15th june: yesterday it was a very wonderful open studio day with a lot a heartful friends here. we had a great time being next to mainstage and being in direct contact with different show acts (when they have been backstage) they made it possible that it was the first day that I didn´t cry since Brian left this world.

it was a very hard week to handle. and when I saw pictures of myself (from yesterday) ... just being skin and bones ... I got scared by them and myself

will start to eat more as soon as possible and perhaps start with some push-ups too

today is the second the of lesbian-gay-streetparty and open studio. everyone is welcomed to come here and say *hi*

15th june: Brian-Tennessee Claflin´s REVOLUTION denim jacket. I know that this piece of art belongs to the public from now on. but for the next weeks perhaps months I need private things such as this jacket just for me and to grieve. I don´t know when this denim jacket will be shown the next time in public. so am I asking you to watch it today if you want to see it in real. REVOLUTION is Brian´s answer for the question "how to change America"

15th june: ^^Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^´s SHOCKING just skin&bones body is wearing <3 Joe Dallesandro <3 ... after watching THAT picture today, I immediatly started to eat again



PORKparty 1st june 2014
filed under parties




GREAT and CROWDED night at F3000



*Rainbow flag* 29th may 2014
filed under mix

during the pride weeks there are rainbow flags all around the city ... next to city halls and here next to the underground station Nollendorfplatz

on the pic: with Jurassica Parka (left), Jörg Steinert (right), ...


*Enough Is Enough* 17th may 2014
filed under mix

today happened the demonstration "Enough Is Enough" against Homo- and Transphobia.

actions such as this one, are very important.

on the pic you see phantastic Dr.Motto (YES, one of the founders of LOVEPARAD) ... what wonderful guy <3




fantasy48 *new paintings* 7th may 2014
filed under
fantasy48 - paintings

and this is how it looks like when I create my paintings: I choose one of my photographies and do an interpretation in oil on canvas

here you see a painting/photography of the Heatherette show at Lifeball in Vienna from the year 2007

------------------- price for each painting of this serie: 90 euro --------------------



some postings which I created on facebook 17th april 2014 - 12th may 2014
filed under mix

stories mix posted on facebook:

17th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ *Good Night Everyone <3 I am prepared for Easter °° after listening twice J.S.Bach´s Easter Oratorio °° ... sometimes classic music is really good :*

18th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ that moment when: you buy 1,5 kilogramm fresh, darkred, delicious strawberries on a market and think "oh, this should be enough for one week" ... and then realizing after some hours, that they should be eaten within 2 days ^^ OH YES, since 2 days I am eating non-stop strawberries with homemade vanilla sugar and it´s *mmmmyyyammmmyyy* =P

18th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ °° Easter? WHAT? °° okokok: I was never interested in "those" barbaric stories behind those "special" bible days. people tell it every year what each day means, but as soon as I hear the stories I forgot them already. I LOVE IT: that for some days people seem to be & life free - without capitalistic chains - and YES, I like bunnies and tons of chocolate in funky packing too ... means everything is good and fine "VIVA EASTER" ... or however you would like to name it ;=

18th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ first painting after an about 10 days break - in the past 10 days I was too sick, had too much work and it was too cold in my studio - but now I think this version of an male easter bunny is a good start in a new painting session*

19th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ Selbstgespräche "NEIN, du mußt deinen FB-Freunden nicht alles mitteilen! NEIN NICHT ALLES! NEIN, es muß nicht jeeeeeeder wissen, daß du gerade HARALD GLÖÖCKLER AUF QVC ANSIEHST! NEEEEEIIIIN POSTE DAS NIIIIIIICHT ! " =D

19th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^´s Open Studio is open °° YES, Schöneberg is exploding with all those thousands of fetish tourists *WZOOOOM* it´s leather & fetish Eastermeeting in Schöneberg °° HAPPY EASTER °°

20th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ saturday night in Berlin: perfect moment to study a P H A N T A S T I C painting created by Mr. Turner ^^

20th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ I think, that everyone can open the doors to the power of the universe ... and I think some thousands years ago each one of us did it ... but today - on a special way - we feel that we are not allowed anymore to open those doors and only few of us do it ... once you opened this door and walked that way, you never want to return anymore. result: let´s do it and get strong together ^^

21st april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^´s little easter story: I think that thousands of years ago old human tribes had an AMAZING knowledge about how to use body, soul & spirit in connection with nature and the universe. further I think that this knowledge got lost when people started getting "busy" - busy with playing with fire, toys made of stones, ... and of course with starting to get into wars with other tribes. today our planet is on a point of no return: the earth as planet will not be destroyed, but a lot what does exist on it. very soon the humans will have to change their way of life in a complete new way. and I think that to re-learn the true power of the human spirit will be one key in the change into a new world ...

23rd april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^´s wednesday morning paintings ^^ ... and pleeeeaaaaaase: when someone - as I do - has role models such as Picasso, Richter and Bacon Do Not expect eeeevery painting as "beautiful" ... some days ago someone said: "oh this is not the kind of portrait of me, what I did expect" *hhhmmmmpfff* welcome to the world of art :*

24th april:
ok, now I did understand it: IN AMERICA: people own a home (house, flat,...) ... then a member of the family becomes sick ... because the members of the family LOVE that person, they go on debt with their home to afford medical health care ... but the bank wants muuuuch mooooore money because of hight interests ... people can´t afford it anymore and loose their homes. this circle of a devil is insane and barbaric. NOBODY SHOULD LOOSE HIS HOME BECAUSE OF LOVING SOMEONE AND HELPING A PERSON WHO IS SICK !!!

25th april:
aaaaaaach uuuuuuund wer am CSD-Samstag garnicht weiß wo er jetzt nun hin soll: das ^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art Open Studio ^^ ist natürlich wie jeden Samstag ab 15 uhr geöffnet und sehr gerne an Diskussionen zu Themen wie "Queer Leben in Indien, Jamaika, Russland, Uganda, ... " interessiert, ach ja und Party gibt´s natürlich auch =D

25th april:
+++ ACHTUNG +++ ACHTUNG +++ kriminelle Banden auf Faceboock unterwegs - sie kopieren Profile - geben sich als diese Person aus - und wollen natürlich irgendwann Geld ....

Hier die Nachricht welche von einem Fake-Profil einer sehr guten Freundin an mich gesendet wurde (meine Freundin hat mittlerweile die Polizei darüber informiert)

:) Alles bestens?
Kann ich dich um etwas bitten?
Hab keinen Akku kann dich nicht anrufen, deshalb schreibe ich dir hier.
Habe meine freunde sortiert und dich aus versehen geloschst sorry

25th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ when I was a little child and I watched with my parents the movie my parents wanted to see - at that time just 2 channels did exist and 1 television in the flat - then it was her I was most phascinated of <3 Audrey Hepburn <3

26th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ will start now with the painting of 2 portraits of a wonderful German Police Man from a photoshooting we did 2 days ago ^^ I am already excited ^^

26th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ saturday background painting day ^^ it´s the first time that I painted a wall* yes, after painting with oil on canvas for 1 year and 4 months - I would still say, that I am an absolute beginner :)

26th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ ... for the statistic: 2011 + 2012 first experiments with oil on canvas 2013 + 2014 intense working with oil on canvas ^^ 186 paintings have been created in those years*

27th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ just filled up my photo wall with photographies which are ready paint in oil on canvas* Mona Lisa, a looot of girls, Marlene Dietrich, some hot boys, nature and Tilda <3

27th april:
destroyed air - destroyed water (ocean, lakes,...) - destroyed (rain)forrests - destroyed .... " You must be a dreamer, when you think the world is not in the middle of its process of destrutction and the final crash (when people will start panicing and fighting against eachother) will come soon "

28th april:
+++ BERLIN: AMERICAN BOY BEATEN UP FOR BEING GAY BY 5 !!! YOUNG MEN +++ 2 days ago a wonderful, colorful young american friend was sitting in the underground when 5 young men (described as "turkish looking") entered the train. they started to insult him - he ignored them and said no word, because he almost doesn´t understand German - he just understood words such as "Bist du schwul?" ("Are you gay?"). then one guy spit in the boy´s face - as he wanted to leave: those 5 !!! young men did beat the boy while he was laying on the floor. ----- something like that is A NIGHTMARE happening to someone - bruises in his face and damage on his soul. ----- right now he is thinking about how to handle those terrible moments in the underground ----- I don´t know too what to do, this is why I make this shocking story public: PLS when you have some advice or just some nice words for him: pls comment on this post or private message (which I will send to him) - would be good in english because he speaks only few words german.
pls now I need your help too: Gloria David Margot Marco Bruno Walter Michael Marcello Barbie Florian Holger Chantal BerlinAvantgarde Ades Eisenherz Ira

28th april:
B I G THANK U* to all the support to this american boy who got beaten up for being gay by 5 young men (pls find the full story on the postings before). now he knows that he is not alone and can decide what to do.

I like to say, that: this is not the spirit of Berlin, that queer people should have fear using the underground, walking on the street, ... it´s in the history and soul of Berlin, that PEOPLE ARE ABLE TO LIFE FREE IN THIS CITY ! many hundreds of years nobody wanted to life in this city, because everytime when there has been war in Europe, then those different armies and wars passed through Berlin. it was a survival taktic, that Berlin said "ok, when nobody wants to life here, then everybody can life here who doesn´t want to stay somewhere else." this is the reason why that many queer people, other thinking people, ... and jewish people too, lifed and life in Berlin and created this soul - it´s the original Prussian spirit. ... and when idiots think that they want to destroy that Berlin soul, and people should have fear, THEN THERE IS THE TIME TO SAY " NO WAY! NOBODY SHOULD BE BEATEN UP FOR BEING GAY ! "

30th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ ... und jetzt mit gaaaaanz viel Vorfreude BILD-Zeitung lesen *HAHAHA* 4 : 0 wurden die Bayern abgeschossen und das von meinem Lieblingsverein REAL MADRID ^^ Ik freu ma auf die BILD und alle anderen deutschen Schmierblattzeitungen =D =D =D

30th april:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ 6 new paintings finished on which I was working on the past 4 weeks ^^ will post them later after I did eat my lunch*

3rd may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ Empress Sissy & Emperor Franz Joseph I. from Austria ( ^^ Da Kaisa und die Sissy ^^ ) would loooooove today´s Open Studio Cake =oP it´s their favorite one: *Kaiserroulade mit selbstgemachten Zwetschkenröster* (cake with homemade plums jam :*

4th may: (Warhol´s flowers)
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ one of my most loved paintings in the time when I was a teenager ^^ about 25 years ago when I was in Munich, I was looking in a catalogue for a museum which presents Warhol paintings. when I went to the museum and asked for the Warhol´s, then they told me, that they are in the storage. ... yes, before the resent Warhol hype, there was a time when Warhol wasn´t hyped not at all ... I always loved his work*

6th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ hmmmm* just looked at the photos of GALLERY WEEKEND in Berlin .... and what should I say "I know NOBODY - never saw those faces - never heard their names" <= I think THIS is the reason that I offer my paintings for about 50 bucks and not 50 000 ... I think I should change something with my life in the Berlin artworld =D

6th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ is SHOCKED right now. the latest profile picture is a CLUB KIDS PAINTING ... and I had no idea about it ... till now. In 2007 I was at Lifeball in Vienna and Heatherette have been there with a show - till that day I never heard that name before (... okokok BIG SORRY!) but the show was PHANTASTIC COLORFUL and FUN ^^ ...and just right now I realized how Heatherette´s RICHIE RICH is or was ... a CLUB KID ... the universe is playing games with me *hhhmmmmppppfffff*

7th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ just since about 12 hours I know that the "CLUB KIDS" did exist and since about 12 hours I am watching non-stop all those movies from the 90s from New York* (pls find them on youtube) ... the idea of Club Kids is absolutly phascinating (reminded me of the beginning of Punk in London) and its enormous waves reach us till today with Heatherette´s Richie Rich, James St.James, and maaaany more ... right now I am kind of hypnothized

8th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ someone (which I don´t know) was standing about 10 minutes in front of 7 of my paintings in Avantgarde Gallery - then he said "they look as been painted from a child." *I think this is one of the biggest compliment possible for me as painter

8th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ *** it´s sooooooooo weird: I am and aaaaaalways was a CLUB KID ... without knowing it =D

*** it seemed that I always felt this CLUB KID spirit coming from New York ... without knowing it =D

*** sometimes I think that someone should have told me about the CLUB KIDS before, because sometimes I felt misunderstood, freaky in a bad way, and sometimes lonely ... in the past years

*** CLUB KIDS is a movement which seems to me like a (meanwhile) global family ... which I found only about 3 days ago ... everything is new and looks EXCITING ^^

*** I have the feeling that the ... next weeks ... next months ... next years will become FIERCYLICIOUS =D <3

9th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ some people may say "Fantasy48 is against capitalism, because he didn´t managed it to become rich."

you are right!
... in the past 40 years ...
I prefered to be happy than running for financial success
I prefered to see and feel the sun than sitting in an office
I prefered to give my little money to people which have less than I have, than to save it
... and meanwhile I create colorful paintings which will exist in 100 years ... and in the year 2128 a little girl will find and look at one of them and it will make her smile :).... and guess what: THAT SMILE FROM THAT LITTLE UNKNOWN GIRL MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME and gives me the power to continue my life as I life it <3

9th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ memories: with PHANTASTIC Tatjana Taft in 2006 ^^ question "is Fantasy48 there a Club Kid already!?" answer "YES, he always was and is =D"

9th may: (zu Deutscher Filmpreis)
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ ... also DAS nennt das ARD eine "Preisverleihung" ... diese passt perfekt ... *äääähmmmm* ... ins VERGANGENE JAHRHUNDERT *hhhmmppppffff* ... jeder welcher in Amerika so eine "Show" organisieren würde, würde SOFORT entlassen werden *LOL*

10th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ yes, those days I am thinking a lot about Club Kids. what I realized is that hundreds/thousands of phantastic creative people built up one of the most exciting movements ever has been created in New York. a loooot of todays big names have been part of it and celebrated with them. they all believed in something and someone. it is not as Punk where nobody really knows where it started ... Club Kids is deeply connected with one name. I will not judge someone who´s life is completely out of control by drug abuse ... there are people created by our society who judge them and this is what they did. *hmmmm* ... and now I have to think about it a little bit more ... to be continued

10th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^ means * "Eurovision Song Contest is thaaaaat muuuuuch of the past century *uuurrrgggsss*" *** WORLDVISION Song Contest *** T H A T is something I would be interested in =D yeah, right I am NOT interested in ESC and also didn´t look at it ... because I think that show is booooooring *andnowyoucanhateme :*

12th may:
+++ ACHTUNG! +++ ACHTUNG! +++ Intoleranz im deutschsprachigen Raum - dieses Bild teile ich, damit man sich auch mal mit "allgemeinen" Kommentaren aus der deutschsprachigen Gesellschaft auseinandersetzt. EINFACH NUR SCHOCKIEREND wieviele Menschen in einer Andersartigkeit-als-die-ihre ein Feindbild sehen und dies auf schlimmste Art und Weise äussern.

12th may:
<3 my mom <3 my Austrian mom needed decades to accept that her son is gay ... and Conchita Wurst made it within 3 minutes that she became a BIG fan of her *hmmmm* <3 the world changed and my mom changed <3 love my mom :*

12th may:
^^ Fantasy48 The Emperor of Art ^^*what a night! Conchita is important for this world .... and I know that she is reaching queer kids in the deepest forrests all over the world *Thank You for that Conchita* ... but now I need someone to remind me what means to have voice *WHITNEY I NEED YOU HERE RIGHT NOW :*



*my Berlin* 23rd april 2014
filed under mix

* my Berlin *

on the pic above: a car crash with an old woman and a dramatic sexy lady from Munich. on "events" like that one many of the neighbours who are living here are meeting eachother on the street ...

on the pic below: Victoria-Louise-Place - one of the most beautiful places in Berlin* Billy Wilder lived here before world war II - in the building behind me and his view was quite similar like this on that picture



*Berlin at night* 15th april 2014
filed under mix

the area between Warschauer Str. and Ostkreuz is a very popular partyarea in Berlin, but I think that I have never been there in those 10 years since I live in Berlin.

but for tonite I got an invitation to a party at R19 and it was really exciting to explore that area - till I reached the club I passed uncountable clubs and bars - a loooooot of graffiti and full moon in the sky^^

the party at R19 was very relaxing and to chill - I liked it there*

every tuesday there happens the party " Dada O Nada " and I think I will go there more often*



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